What about “tribespeople”?

Well, we’ve seen some deflection tactics in our time but citing some unnamed “tribe” in some unnamed part of the world as a reason for not changing your behaviour takes the entire barrel of biscuits. We hope you didn’t hurt yourself when you hit rock bottom, Chris.

But wait, we should not jump to conclusions. If you are one of the 370 million Indigenous people on the planet whose food systems are described as “highly productive, sustainable and equitable… [they] preserve rich biodiversity, provide nutritious food and are climate resilient and low carbon” then we apologise. It’s just from your profile it very much looks like you’re a bloke from a highly developed country where the modern animal-based food system drives climate breakdown, pollution, deforestation, wild species loss, malnutrition from overconsumption, many chronic and zoonotic diseases, and is helping antibiotic-resistant pathogens to emerge. Stop us if we’re wrong but ‘London’ gave us one clue about you. ‘Single’ gave us another. But since you are keen to display concern about the wellbeing of Indigenous peoples, would you care to learn which industry is among those responsible for driving so many from their homes? Yes, it’s the meat industry.

For all the reasons cited above, and more, we would definitely prefer that people stop eating meat, but we’re not trying to persuade Indigenous peoples to do so. We’re trying to persuade you, Chris. We’re doing all this for you.

We’re making food that looks, cooks and tastes like meat so you don’t miss the flavours you’re used to. We’re making VFC accessible so you can find it easily while out shopping. We’re handing it to you on a plate, and in return we’re asking only that you make one small switch and do your bit to reduce suffering and to protect the environment before we annihilate almost every wild animal, and leave the remaining few to cook on an overheated planet, and all you can do is whine “what about the tribes”?

We have to be honest, Chris, you have flat-out annoyed us.

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